Zoolander (2001)

Orange Mocha Frappuccino Scene 5

The following quotes are the direct screenplay transcript of Scene 5, "Orange Mocha Frappuccino", from the film Zoolander.

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CHARACTERS IN SCENE 5

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SCENE TRANSCRIPT
  • Rufus
    I can't stand Hansel!
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  • Meekus
    I know, right? Riding in on that scooter like he's so cool.
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  • Rufus
    And the way Hansel combs his hair.
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  • Meekus
    Or, like, doesn't. It's like, "'Ex-squeeze' me, but have you ever heard of styling gel?"
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  • Brint
    I'm sure Hansel's heard of styling gel. He's a male model.
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  • Meekus
    Earth to Brint. I was making a joke.
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  • Brint
    Earth to Meekus. Duh, okay? I knew that.
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  • Meekus
    Earth to Brint. I'm not so sure you did 'cause you were all, "Well, I'm sure he's heard of styling gel." Like you didn't know it was a joke.
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  • Brint
    I knew it was a joke, Meekus. I just didn't get it right away.
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  • Meekus
    Earth to Brint...
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  • Derek Zoolander
    Would you guys stop it already! Did you ever think that maybe there's more to life than being really, really, really, ridiculously good-looking? I mean, maybe we should be doing something more meaningful with our lives. Like helping people.
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  • Brint
    Derek, what people?
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  • Derek Zoolander
    I don't know. People who need help.
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  • Rufus
    Models help people. They make them feel good about themselves.
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  • Meekus
    They also show them how to dress cool, and wear their hair in interesting ways.
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  • Derek Zoolander
    I guess so.
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  • Brint
    You know what could really help you sort through these important issues?
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  • Derek Zoolander
    What?
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  • Three Of Them
    Orange mocha frappuccino!
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  • Meekus
    Yeah! Yeah!
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  • Brint
    Come on, man! Come on!
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