Wedding Crashers (2005)

That Was My First Asian Scene 12

The following quotes are the direct screenplay transcript of Scene 12, "That Was My First Asian", from the film Wedding Crashers.

Please click the favorite button below the quotes you like, to help us identify the best quotes from Wedding Crashers.

Enjoy this? Share it with friends!

SCENE TRANSCRIPT
  • Claire Cleary
    You totally saved me.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    No.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Claire Cleary
    Yes.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Sack Lodge
    Claire, come on. Come on. Oh, baby, you were awesome.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Claire Cleary
    No.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Sack Lodge
    Listen to me, awesome.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Claire Cleary
    Okay. John, this is my boyfriend, Sack.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Sack Lodge
    Hey, fella.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    How you doing?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Sack Lodge
    Listen, we gotta go meet the Schreibers.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Claire Cleary
    Okay. It was great to meet you. Thank you.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Sack Lodge
    Boom, I gotcha.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Claire Cleary
    How you doing?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Some Kid
    Oh, great. Good to see you.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    I gotta get out of here, pronto. I got a Stage 5 clinger.
    3 people liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    No, no, I need more time.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Did you hear what I just said to you? Stage 5? Virgin? Clinger? Let's go, I'm gonna start the car. I'm serious, let's go. I don't think you appreciate the urgency. Not only is she a virgin, she's totally off the reservation. I'm terrified of this broad.
    3 people liked this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    There you are.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Hey, Gloria, wow. What a coincidence, I was just singing your praises. This is John Ryan.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    Oh, hi.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Yeah.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    My family and a few friends, we're all going back to our place on the shore... and it would be so great if you guys came.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Really? Sounds sort of wonderful.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    I am... Well, it does, it sounds very nice. And I'm flattered that you would think of me Gloria to include me in something like that. Thank you. It kills me however to have to tell you I'm sorry, I just... Timing's no good. I can't make it.
    1 person liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Why?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    It's gonna be so much fun.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    It's gonna be so much fun.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    I'm sure it will be fun for the people that are going. I unfortunately can't go. I don't have... I only have this small piece. I don't have any clothes.
    1 person liked this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    Well, we have everything you need.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Problem solved. Problem solved.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    The problem's not solved.
    1 person liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Deal us in.
    1 person liked this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    Oh, cool, cool, cool. I'm gonna run and find my dad.
    1 person liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    No no no! Don't ask your dad. Don't ask your...
    1 person liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    The train's going. We gotta get on.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Why not just feed me to the lions?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    What?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Step on my head when I'm drowning.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    What a great friend?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    What do you mean, what? John, this is completely against the rules. You have a wedding and a reception to seal the deal. Period. There's no overtime.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Oh, no overtime?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    No.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    What about the Chang wedding three years ago?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Oh, that's bullshit.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Yeah, thought I forgot about that. Two a. m., you dragged me 50 miles to watch you and some chick play mahjong with her grandmother at a retirement home.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Yeah, completely different situation.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    How?
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    What do you mean, how? She was a very, very family-oriented girl. She was very into her grandmother.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Give me a break.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    That was my first Asian!
    3 people liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    You better lock it up.
    2 people liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    You better lock it up.
    2 people liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    No, you lock it up.
    2 people liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    You lock it up.
    1 person liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Lock it up.
    1 person liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Lock it up.
    1 person liked this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    Please. It would mean so much to me. Please.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Look at the way he's looking at me. I can tell he doesn't like me. He's the secretary of the treasury. To be honest with you, my taxes aren't exactly in line.
    1 person liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Oh come on! You're being paranoid.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    He's threatened by the way I dance. Damn it. Why'd I have to go showing off like that? Now I'm all over his radar. Stupid.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    You're not that good a dancer.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Oh, please. You and I both know I'm a phenomenal dancer. Now I know you're lying. You'll do anything to get me to go... even if I have to walk right into the lion's den.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Secretary Cleary
    Gloria, come on! You know I'm not gonna give in to this kind of behavior.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    She's like a kid at Toys "R" Us. I can't be around it.
    2 people liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Oh, get off your high horse. Stop judging people.
    1 person liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    You take off the white wig and you stop judging me. I don't want to be around someone who's a nut job.
    2 people liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    I need alone time with her.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    You wanna hang out with Claire... the boyfriend and Sybil, by all means. I'm not going.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    I'll lay it out for you in simple chapter and verse: You're going.
    2 people liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Let me break it down for you so you'll understand, I'll hold your hand like a small child: I'm not going.
    2 people liked this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Yes you are.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    You can go if you want.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    You're gonna be a team player.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    No, I'm not.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    He'd love you to come.
    Be the first to like this quote

  • John Beckwith
    Yes. Yes! Baba ganoush!
    1 person liked this quote

  • Jeremy Grey
    Well...
    Be the first to like this quote

  • Gloria Cleary
    Baba ganou!
    Be the first to like this quote

Enjoy this? Share it with friends!