Wedding Crashers

Midnight Rape or the Gay Art Show

Wedding Crashers
About Wedding Crashers
  • Released in 2005
  • Directed by David Dobkin
  • Produced by New Line Cinema
Characters in This Scene
John Beckwith
Owen Wilson
Jeremy Grey
Vince Vaughn
Midnight Rape or the Gay Art Show Full Transcript
John Beckwith
There he is. It's the big guy! Get in here. Wait till you see the spread. Anything you want.
  • 0
Jeremy Grey
Yeah, well, get what you want to go. Ferry leaves in 25 minutes. We gotta get out of here.
  • 0
John Beckwith
Whoa, what's your problem? Have some of this stuff.
  • 1
Jeremy Grey
I didn't get a lot of sleep last night, John. I'm fried.
  • 8
John Beckwith
Soft mattress?
  • 8
Jeremy Grey
Yeah, that could've been it. It could have been the soft mattress, or the midnight rape... or the nude, gay art show in my room. One of those probably added to the lack of sleep.
  • 2
John Beckwith
Try one of these scones, you'll love them.
  • 8
Jeremy Grey
I'm a little too traumatized to have a scone. Let's move.
  • 3
John Beckwith
Will you slow down for a second? The whole eye-drop thing backfired. Okay? It didn't work. She had to leave me and go attend to him. Why are you looking at me like that?
  • 1
Jeremy Grey
You're falling for this broad.
  • 6
John Beckwith
No. I just met her.
  • 2
Jeremy Grey
Exactly. I'm gonna go.
  • 1
John Beckwith
You can't go.
  • 3
Jeremy Grey
Watch me. Watch me take this on down the road.
  • 2
John Beckwith
Look, if you leave, Gloria is gonna freak out and throw a shit fit. And it's gonna go into crisis lockdown mode here at the house.
  • 6
Jeremy Grey
I don't give a baker's fuck. I just had my own sock duct-taped into my mouth last night.
  • 0
John Beckwith
Whoa, what?
  • 2
Jeremy Grey
Yeah, the sock... that I wore around all day, playing football in, pouring sweat in was shoved into my mouth, and there was duct tape over it.
  • 1
John Beckwith
Let's talk about it. I'm a good listener.
  • 0
Jeremy Grey
I'm not in a place to discuss what happened. Okay? I felt like Jodie Foster in The Accused last night. I'm gonna go home, see Dr. Finkelstein... and I'm gonna tell him we got a whole new bag of issues. We can forget about Mom for a while. I'm gonna go.
  • 3
John Beckwith
Suit yourself. Rule number 1. Rule number 1: Never leave a fellow crasher behind.
  • 1
Jeremy Grey
I can't believe how selfish you are.
  • 2
John Beckwith
I need you.
  • 2
Jeremy Grey
A friend in need is a pest. I'll stick it out with you because you're desperate.
  • 1
John Beckwith
I need the big guy.
  • 2
Jeremy Grey
I'll try to give you a little bit more time because somebody can't close.
  • 3
John Beckwith
Fair enough.
  • 0
Jeremy Grey
But if you want my help, you gotta listen. Number one: Stop being a pussy. Number two: Make a move. Number three... You know it. Could you pop the syrup for me? Just as a top off? Here's what's gonna happen, Tonto. Kimosabe's gonna have some flavor. I'm gonna choose not to eat with you.
  • 10
John Beckwith
We're not eating together?
  • 0
Jeremy Grey
No. I'd like to recharge my batteries, and shut down the engines... and get myself back to neutral. When the meal's over with, I will talk to you. I don't want to get into what happened last night cause' it'll only make me mad. Let's get through today, let's keep our eye on the prize, let's focus... and let's close some ass.
  • 2
John Beckwith
Noted. Can I tell you something without you getting angry? I love you. Yeah, you, big guy.
  • 0
Jeremy Grey
I love you too.
  • 1