Wedding Crashers (2005)

That Painting Was a Gift Scene 39

The following quotes are the direct screenplay transcript of Scene 39, "That Painting Was a Gift", from the film Wedding Crashers.

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SCENE TRANSCRIPT
  • John Beckwith
    And do you maybe feel the same way?
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  • Claire Cleary
    Maybe.
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  • John Beckwith
    Maybe. That's all I needed to know.
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  • Claire Cleary
    But this is crazy, because I don't know any...
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  • John Beckwith
    Why?
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  • Claire Cleary
    I don't know anything about you!
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  • John Beckwith
    What do you mean?
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  • Claire Cleary
    You do investments in New Hampshire... and you have a crazy brother...
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  • John Beckwith
    I need to talk to you. It's not a big deal but maybe you wanna sit back on the swing.
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  • Jeremy Grey
    Run! Johnny! She's trying to kill me!
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  • Claire Cleary
    Grandma!
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  • Jeremy Grey
    Get the gun from her!
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  • Secretary Cleary
    Put the gun down! Mother, stop!
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  • Jeremy Grey
    This is the real world, lady! You can't just go shooting people on a whim!
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  • Todd Cleary
    Why does Grandma have a gun?
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  • John Beckwith
    What did you do?
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  • Jeremy Grey
    I told you that in confidence. That was a confession.
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  • Claire Cleary
    What are you talking about?
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  • Sack Lodge
    Why don't you tell her, John?
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  • John Beckwith
    I don't know what's going on.
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  • Sack Lodge
    You don't know?
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  • John Beckwith
    I'm playing catch-up, too.
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  • Sack Lodge
    I don't...
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  • Claire Cleary
    Sack, what are you doing?
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  • John Beckwith
    Remembering yet? You remember yet?
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  • Claire Cleary
    Are you okay?
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  • Sack Lodge
    They're not who they say they are, Claire. Those aren't even their real names.
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  • Claire Cleary
    What?
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  • Sack Lodge
    No! Everything he told you is a lie.
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  • Claire Cleary
    I don't understand.
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  • Sack Lodge
    Claire, they crash weddings. They crash weddings so they can sleep with girls. Everything that they have told us is a complete fabrication.
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  • Claire Cleary
    No, you're joking.
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  • Sack Lodge
    All of it is... Don't you fucking get up.
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  • Claire Cleary
    Sack, will you just stop?
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  • Sack Lodge
    Okay, okay.
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  • Claire Cleary
    Is that true?
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  • John Beckwith
    No, well, it's... Not entirely.
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  • Claire Cleary
    No, it's a yes-or-no question.
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  • John Beckwith
    I know, but it's complicated.
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  • Claire Cleary
    Yes or no? Yes or no?
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  • John Beckwith
    Yes. With shades of gray.
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  • Jeremy Grey
    I'm not perfect, but who are we kidding? Neither are you. And you wanna know what? I dig it.
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  • Todd Cleary
    Jeremy tried to seduce me!
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  • John Beckwith
    You did?
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  • Todd Cleary
    I want my painting back.
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  • Jeremy Grey
    The painting was a gift, Todd. I'm taking it with me.
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  • Secretary Cleary
    You had me going, son. I thought it was something special. There's a ferry leaving in 10 minutes. I suggest you be on it. Come on, let's go.
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  • Jeremy Grey
    I want you.
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  • Gloria Cleary
    I love you.
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  • Sack Lodge
    He made a fool out of you, Claire. Come on, let's go. Sweetheart.
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