Wedding Crashers (2005)

Jeremy Seduces Gloria Scene 9

The following quotes are the direct screenplay transcript of Scene 9, "Jeremy Seduces Gloria", from the film Wedding Crashers.

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CHARACTERS IN SCENE 9

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SCENE TRANSCRIPT
  • Gloria Cleary
    So you dove into the icy water? Why would a man risk his own life for the life of a complete stranger?
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  • Jeremy Grey
    The great 19th century philosopher Schopenhauer... he said, at that moment, when a human sees another human in danger... that there's this breaking in of metaphysical awareness. Do you know what that awareness is, Gloria?
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  • Gloria Cleary
    What?
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  • Jeremy Grey
    That we're all one. That separateness is an illusion. And that I'm one with everyone. With the prime minister of England and my cousin Harry. You and me. The fat kid from What's Happening! The Olsen twins. Natalie Portman. The guy who wrote Catcher in the Rye. Nat King Cole. Carrot Top. Jay-Z. "Weird Al" Yankovic. Harry Potter, if he existed. The whore on the street corner. Your mother. We're all one.
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  • Gloria Cleary
    We are?
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  • Jeremy Grey
    That my hands are your hands.
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  • Gloria Cleary
    Oh.
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  • Jeremy Grey
    And that my cheek... is really your cheek. And that my lips...
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  • Gloria Cleary
    Are my lips.
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  • Jeremy Grey
    According to Mr. Schopenhauer, they are.
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