It's Christmas Day Full Transcript
Deadpool (Wade)
Kinda lonesome back here.Yeah, little help.
Dopinder
Okay, um, just, I have to keep my hands on the wheel.
Deadpool (Wade)
Excuse me. Whoo!
Dopinder
Ah, Dopinder.
Deadpool (Wade)
Pool. Dead. Hmm, nice.
Dopinder
Smells good, no?
Deadpool (Wade)
Not the Daffodil Daydream. The girl.
Dopinder
Ah, yes. Gita.
Deadpool (Wade)
Hmm.
Dopinder
She is quite lovely. She would have made me a very agreeable wife. But, um... Gita's heart has been stolen by my cousin Bandhu. He is as dishonorable as he is attractive.
Deadpool (Wade)
Dopinder, I'm starting to think there's a reason I'm in this cab today.
Dopinder
Yeah, sir, you called for it, remember?
Deadpool (Wade)
No, my slender brown friend. Love is a beautiful thing. When you find it, the whole world tastes like Daffodil Daydream. So you gotta hold onto love... ...tight!
Dopinder
Ah.
Deadpool (Wade)
And never let go. Don't make the same mistakes I did. Got it?
Dopinder
Yeah.
Deadpool (Wade)
Or else the whole world tastes like Mama June after hot yoga.
Dopinder
Sir, what does Miss Mama June taste like?
Deadpool (Wade)
Like two hobos fucking in a shoe filled with piss. Okay, enough. I can go all day, Dopinder. The point is, it's bad!
Dopinder
Hmm, it's bad. Uh, why the fancy red suit, Mr. Pool?
Deadpool (Wade)
Oh, that's because it's Christmas Day, Dopinder. And I'm after someone on my naughty list. I've been waiting one year, three weeks... six days and, oh... 14 minutes to make him fix what he did to me.
Dopinder
And what did he do to you, Mr. Pool?
Deadpool (Wade)
This shit... Boo!