Characters in This Scene
Deadpool (Wade)
Ryan Reynolds
Al
Leslie Uggams
Looks Are Everything Full Transcript
Deadpool (Wade)
Oh.
Al
Tylenol PM?
Deadpool (Wade)
You can stick that where you stuck the Bactin. I raided my stash of wisdom tooth Percocet... and I am orbiting fucking Saturn right now. But I appreciate the gesture.
Al
Am I crazy, or is your hand really small?
Deadpool (Wade)
About the size of a KFC spork.
Al
Ugh. I get why you're so pissy... but your mood's never gonna brighten till you find this woman... and tell her how you feel.
Deadpool (Wade)
What do I keep telling you, Mrs. Magoo? She wouldn't have me. If you could see me, you'd understand.
Al
Looks aren't everything.
Deadpool (Wade)
Looks are everything. You ever heard David Beckham speak? It's like he mouth-sexed a can of helium. You think Ryan Reynolds got this far on his superior acting method?
Al
Love is blind, Wade.
Deadpool (Wade)
No. You're blind.
Al
So, you're just gonna lie there and whimper?
Deadpool (Wade)
No, I'm gonna wait till this arm plows through puberty... and then I'm gonna come up with a whole new Christmas Day plan. In the meantime, you might wanna leave the room. I bet it feels huge in this hand. Go, go, go.