Characters in This Scene
Walter Sobchak
John Goodman
Jeffrey Lebowski
Jeff Bridges
Donny Kerabatsos
Steve Buscemi
Shomer Fucking Shabbas Full Transcript
Walter Sobchak
Aitz chaim he, Dude. As the ex used to say.
Jeffrey Lebowski
What the fuck is that supposed to mean? What the fuck are we gonna tell Lebowski?
Walter Sobchak
Huh? Oh, him, uh, I don't know.. um-- what exactly is the problem?
Jeffrey Lebowski
Ah... the problem is-- what do you mean what's the--
Jeffrey Lebowski
There was no... we didn't, uh... they're gonna kill that poor woman, man.
Walter Sobchak
What the fuck are you talking about? That poor woman--that poor slut--kidnapped herself, Come on Dude. You said so yourself.
Jeffrey Lebowski
Man! I said I thought she kidnapped herself! You're the one who's so fucking certain--
Walter Sobchak
That's right, Dude, 100 % certain--
Donny Kerabatsos
They posted the next round of the tournament--
Walter Sobchak
Donny, shut the fu--when do we play?
Donny Kerabatsos
This Saturday. Quintana and--
Walter Sobchak
Saturday! Well they'll have to reschedule.
Jeffrey Lebowski
Walter, what am I gonna tell Lebowski?
Walter Sobchak
I told that fuck down at the league office-- who's in charge of scheduling?
Jeffrey Lebowski
Walter--
Donny Kerabatsos
Burkhalter.
Walter Sobchak
I told that kraut a fucking thousand times I DON'T ROLL ON SHABBAS!
Jeffrey Lebowski
Walter--
Donny Kerabatsos
He already posted it.
Walter Sobchak
WELL THEY CAN FUCKING UN-POST IT!
Jeffrey Lebowski
WHO GIVES A SHIT! Uh, they're gonna kill that poor woman man. What am I gonna tell Lebowski?
Walter Sobchak
Come on Dude, uh, eventually she'll get sick of her little game and, you know, wander on back--
Jeffrey Lebowski
Yeah uh...
Donny Kerabatsos
How come you don't roll on Saturday, Walter?
Walter Sobchak
I'm shomer shabbas.
Donny Kerabatsos
What's that, Walter?
Jeffrey Lebowski
Yeah, and in the meantime, what do I tell Lebowski?
Walter Sobchak
Saturday Donny, is shabbas. The Jewish day of rest. That means I don't work, I um, don't drive a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit DON'T FUCKING ROLL!
Donny Kerabatsos
Sheesh.
Walter Sobchak
SHOMER SHABBAS!
Jeffrey Lebowski
Walter, how am I going to--hows--
Walter Sobchak
Shomer fucking shabbas!
Jeffrey Lebowski
Oh fuck, that, that's it. I'm out of here.
Walter Sobchak
Aw come on Dude. Dude! Dude! ... oh, fuck, you just tell him... uh... tell him we made the drop and everything went, uh, you know--
Donny Kerabatsos
Oh yeah, how'd it go?
Walter Sobchak
Went alright. Dude's car got a little dinged up--
Jeffrey Lebowski
Walter, we didn't make the fucking hand- off man! They didn't get, the fucking money and they're gonna--they're gonna--
Walter Sobchak
They're gonna kill that poor woman.
Donny Kerabatsos
Hey Walter, if you can't ride in a car, how do you get around on Shabbas--
Walter Sobchak
Really, Dude, you surprise me. They're not gonna kill shit. They're not gonna do shit. What can they do? They're a bunch of Fuckin' amateurs. And meanwhile, look at the bottom line. Who's sitting on a million fucking dollars? Am I wrong?
Jeffrey Lebowski
Walter--
Walter Sobchak
Who's got a fucking million fucking dollars sittin' in the trunk of our car?
Jeffrey Lebowski
Our car, Walter?
Walter Sobchak
And what do they got? My dirty undies. My fucking whites---Say, Dude, where is your car?
Donny Kerabatsos
Who's got your undies, Walter?
Walter Sobchak
Where's your car, Dude?
Jeffrey Lebowski
You don't know, Walter?
Walter Sobchak
Hmm. It was parked in a handicapped zone. Perhaps they towed it.
Jeffrey Lebowski
You fucking know it's been stolen!
Walter Sobchak
Well, certainly that's a possibility, Dude--
Jeffrey Lebowski
Aw, fuck it.
Donny Kerabatsos
Where you going, Dude?
Jeffrey Lebowski
I'm goin' home, Donny.
Donny Kerabatsos
Your phone's ringing, Dude.
Jeffrey Lebowski
Thank you, Donny.