Wedding Montage Full Transcript
John Beckwith
Sanjay Collins.
Jeremy Grey
Chuck Vindaloo. Excited to be here.
John Beckwith
Shamus O'Toole.
Jeremy Grey
Bobby O'Shea.
John Beckwith
I'm ready to get drunk.
Jeremy Grey
Ha, ha.
Old Lady
Who is that?
Old Man
Ah, him. I think that's his kid Leonard. The diabetic.
Some Lady
Who is that?
Some Guy
That's Luigi and Gina's son Christopher. You know, the banker.
Chinese Man
Oh, that's Mae Lin's adopted son Benny, the veterinarian.
Girl 1
The French Foreign Legion?
John Beckwith
Yeah. We lost a lot of good men out there.
Girl 2
Wow, really? Mount Everest?
Jeremy Grey
I just don't like to talk about it because we lost so many good men out there.
Girl 2
Oh.
John Beckwith
Lost so many good men out there.
Girl 3
Playing with the Yankees?
John Beckwith
Yes, with the Yankees. You lose good men to trades and unruly fans. I... Look, I don't want to talk about it, I'm sorry.
Girl 4
I... Look, I don't want to talk about it, I'm sorry.
Jeremy Grey
Tattoo on the lower back. Might as well be a bull's-eye.
John Beckwith
You know how they say we only use 10 percent of our brains? I think we only use 10 percent of our hearts.
Jeremy Grey
I feel so tiny in your arms.
Girl 5
Really? How tall are you?
Jeremy Grey
I'm 6'5", but I feel like I'm 4 feet.
John Beckwith
And some poetry, courtesy of Sarah McLachlan.
Jeremy Grey
Beautiful! The bride! All right, let's go, let's go, let's make a memory!
John Beckwith
What are you gonna do for an encore? Walk on water? Great guy. He brung me along too.
Jeremy Grey
Jesus. Come on. You ruined it. Come on. Get in there. You butchered the whole damn cake! You don't treat cake like that. You gotta treat cake like a lady.
John Beckwith
Look at that. Oh, I meant in front of all of them. And then everyone said, "Jabroni!"
Jeremy Grey
Jabroni! This fucking guy, unbelievable! Pop it in. Now spread it around on each other. We need a picture of this. They're crazy! Time to party! Time to party! Come on, get a picture, get a picture, get a picture.
John Beckwith
Hot.
John Beckwith
Oh, no, no. Oh, I'm sorry. Sarah, I feel like I don't even know you.
Vivian
It's Vivian. Would you say you're completely full of shit or just 50 percent?
John Beckwith
I hope just 50, but who knows?